Who Could Not Visit the Kebab Hospital

Any Resturant that sets up shop in Turkey using the name Kebab Hospital has got to bear with the inquisitive who just have to come in to see what it is they do to the humble kebab.

For those who venture into the street-side eatery in Gocek, the rewards are great.


For instead of treating patients, it is those who dine there who are treated!

The small kitchen is open fronted and surround on three sides by glass and it is clear they have nothing to hide.  Good honest fare served simply without fuss or bother on plastic table cloth covered tables and plastic chairs.

Ice cold Efes beer at 5 scoobies for a big glass full makes this place cheap and affordable and tremendous value for money.

Is this the most expensive international airport ever?

Passing through Istanbul we changed flights leaving the International and moving to the Domestic terminal. With an hour to spare until our connection we chose to have a beer apiece and share a bag of crisps.

Unbelievably two local draught beers and the crisps came to US$ 17

I have been to some expensive resorts and extortionist night clubs where drinks can be pricey but in a snack bar at the airport I think this is pretty outrageous

I am wondering, is this the most expensive airport beer?

Have you experienced higher prices?

Do let me know

Bored now

I have long wondered how many people pay attention while the stewardess drones her way through the pre departure safety script.

We have all heard it before, none of us is in any doubt that in the event of an emergency masks like these will drop down in front of you and everyone knows that when the you know what hits the fan it's everyone for themselves.

It is not just because of the extra leg room that I ask for the emergency exit seats.

I do so because when, and if it happens, I want out first because everyone else will panic.

They will do so because they have not listened to the safety brief.

They have not listened to the safety brief because it is boring and never changes.

So hats off to Turkish Airlines who have injected a little humour into their safety briefing films.

It does make them watchable and memorable for the first five or six flights you make with them, but know having watched them for six months or so I find I am just as bored by their same old jokes.

Why not have a different script each time you fly?

Where would we be

It is easy to get lost in unfamiliar airports with signage in languages unfamiliar to the traveller but generally speaking I am on safe ground when I board the airplane.

Seats A and B are always on the right as you head towards the tail and it's a good bet that if your seats are are a letter greater than G you need the aisle on the other side of the plane.

True, some aircraft have two alleyways and some have one but all in all it's pretty difficult to get lost.

So tell me what is the point of the stewardess taking your boarding card, Squinting at it and passing it back telling you what seat you are in or which side of the plane you are on.

Do they think we cannot read?

Stop the Scrum at Boarding

SleazyJet could easily become my favourite airline.

The have

• A good safety record
• A clean and tidy modern fleet of aircraft
• Pleasant mannered crews who appear to enjoy what they do
• A good selection of destinations
• Competitive fares

So why are they not top of my list?

Simply really it's because of the rugby scrum they persist on perpetuating at boarding.

If anyone on the high street tried to do it they would be prosecuted for inciting riots!

Not only is it dangerous but it is degrading as well bringing out the worst of human traits in your fellow passengers.

Of course I hear you say all you have to do is pay for speedy boarding and you will get preferential treatment

Not so it merely means a group of businessmen on expenses get to have their own riot before you get to have yours

There are now so many people paying for speeding boarding that the term almost breaks the trade description act

Come on Sir Stellios get a grip and give everyone a seat at checkin.

It cannot cost anything and it would almost definitely allow easyJet to become the Worlds Favourite Airline

Now where I have I heard that phrase before?

Cheap or Low Cost?

Cheap or Low Cost, call them what you like, the Budget airlines have changed the way we fly.

Now, in my opinion they are doing something else as well!  They are teaching the more traditional carriers how to behave when it comes to passenger service.

Now of course I am not including Ryan Air in that statement,  every seasoned and regular flyer knows that life is far too short for Ryan Air, but the others are definately making a real effort and are certainly showing the flag carriers a trick or two.

Yes I know, for some strange reason, EasyJet prefer to have you stamped dangerously onto an aircraft rather than allocate you a seat but at least when you get to the flying cigar tube, you are greeted with a smile and generally by someone who is clearly enjoying the job of sky waiter unlike the sourpuss poh faced girls who man the British Airways flights and think of them selves as a cut above the average passenger.

They are paid far less and even have to clean up the mess passengers make of their aircraft during the flights so if anything, you would think the staff aboard the low cost carriers would have more reason to be in a grot!

Here think I ought to rate the sleazyJet team as being even better than say FlyBe or BMI Baby.

In fact, if Sleazy where to allocate seats, they might become my short haul airline of choice.

What do you think?  Please leave a comment, I cannot be the only cantankerous traveller in the world can I?

Bordeaux Beggars Belief

I had reason to visit Bordeaux for a one night stay recently and it is not a city to commend.

It may well be France's sixth largest conurbation but I doubt that the country is proud of it either.

Beggars, loads of them, not quite to Mumbai standards, but never the less enough to notice and eventually get annoyed at.

It also seems devoid of anywhere nice to eat, what I might call middle priced food.  After an hour and a half of walking the streets peering into empty restaurants we eventually found one that served a half decent meal which with wine cost at least £35 and used ingredients that must have cost less than 10 even allowing 3 for the wine.

If for any reason you find yourself looking for an hotel and someone recommends Le Dauphin ask your self why?

Not since the days I lugged a back pack around the globe in the 1960's have I stayed in a doss house hardly better than the worst possible youth hostel.

Breakfast was rubbish and the only reason I went was because the fire alarm sounded constantly from 0720 for 10 minutes until someone arrived from a security company to switch it off.

By then I was too awake to return to my bed.

The staff, rather sensibly, do not live in the hotel and are absent from 5 30 in the afternoon until breakfast time. So they were little help and had it been a real fire I fear lives would have been lost.

Cheap yes but value for money? Defiantly no!